Thursday 19 April 2012


In London it was digital switchover day. So as the other week, it was my task to visit the mother-in-law to sort out her TV. This is no hardship as she is a sweetie.

Last time I managed without problems and also did Tom's, the chap in the upstairs flat.

The only difference this time was I had to collect my sister-in-law Maureen from London's Paddington station.

Could I find it? I knew I was close. At the moment there are huge building works for the new East/West Crossrail service which I am sure will be brilliant when it's completed several years after my death at a ripe old age.

I drove round and round until it was time for her train to arrive, so decided the only thing to do was park on a meter and walk. Even this is no longer simple! I parked and followed the signs to the meter to discover there wasn't one. I had to try and do it by phone or face a fine of several million pounds.

It was automated, the bane of modern transactions. As a novice at this I had to do everything twice.

I was striding towards the station when the machine asked me for the number of the parking bay for a second or was it third time? So I had to leg it all the way back before I was cut off.

80p plus 20p "transaction charge" later, I managed to meet up with Maureen and hustle her through the rain to the car. Then it was off to Barnet to drop her off and retune the tv like a dutiful son-in-law.

Could I get it to work? No. All I succeeded in doing was wiping every channel from her set. Judging by the look I received I had better fix it pronto or I'll be out of the will!

A call to the helpline and I did exactly what I had done previously and it worked perfectly. The TV was mocking me. All I needed was to retune mine and full house.

My box refused to retune. It would load twnety channels, Then thirty-two or maybe sometimes fifty-one. However all I could access was "Babestation" or "The Jewellery Channel"

I called the helpline. A nice patient Scottish lady talked me through it, before in the end she gave up too and said there was nothing more she could suggest. I thanked her and seethed.

Just at bedtime I tried to reload, and well swipe me if it didn't all load perfectly.

I have seen the future. "I, Robot" is here. We are controlled by our technology.

1 comment:

Slyppery Syd said...

Ha ha ha ... go job Alex is on the radio BEHIND the mic and not an engineer twiddling those knobs 'n thingies.
You should know better at your age.
...... and STOP scaring the kids pulling a face like that! This is a family show!
Hissing Syd