MARGHERITAVILLE

Last full day before my first holiday with "the family". We are off to Florida.

I'm really looking forward to it. We've only really spent weekends together before so, as Step-father to a 16 year old girl and a 13 year old boy, I'm aware there could be teen tensions. However, I have factored certain fail safes into the trip. Diversions!

The first few days are going to be at the Harry Potter experience park thingy in Orlando, Florida.

In preparation I've watched all 8 films. So I'm good to go. I know Voldermort. I can name Slitherin as one of the Hogwarts Houses and Robbie Coltrane is a big grubby bloke and there is a very irritating elf thing called Knobby that gets killed and - I'm ashamed to say - I was glad.

Then we are driving 6 hours down to Key West. We've got a good deal on a big car. So if there is any risk of argument, all four of us can be separated by several feet.

When we get to our apartment, Jamie and I are going to go on a scuba diving course. This lasts three days.

So whilst the Dark Lady and Ella lie on the beach soaking up the rays and fighting off the attentions of oily Lotharios, we shall - in theory - be exploring reefs. Though in practice I think we may be in the pool trying to get water out of our masks.

My mate, Tony, who is a very experienced diver sent me this useful piece of advice:

"Slow movement and slow deep breaths. It is wonderful. Don't kiss any sharks"!

The fortnight will fly by. As I have told the family

"We will have fun. THAT IS AN ORDER"!