AS I LAY ME DOWN TO SLEEP...

"What time do you sleep? I never know when to phone you!" A couple of typical remarks that I have received on numerous occasions over the years. The answer is, always call me at lunchtime. If I am not awake by then, I will probably have died so you won't be disturbing me.

With the new hours it seemed like a pretty good thing to try and cause minimum disruption to the bed time routine.

If you work nights you are probably aware how disruptive it can be. Another thing people often ask is: “how do you have a social life?” Well, for years I didn't, is the short answer. However, since moving back to London in 2008, I was determined to make sure that I had as good a time as I could, bearing in mind the restrictions.

Staying up all night and then starting the programme is not an option for me; it would mean that by the time we have got going, I would feel like going to bed which doesn't make for a very lively show. We are not “Radio Quiet”.

If you tune around at 2 in the morning, if there is music playing it tends to be the "let us soothe you gently to sleepy bo bo land 17 in a row here on Anodyne FM". Failing that, a shouty phone in with a selection of bigots arguing the toss for transportation to the New World for anyone caught committing even the most minor offence. “Parking on a double yellow? Not opening a door for a lady? Hang ‘em. Hang ‘em again then sentence them to life. That should mean life. Then hang ‘em a third time for good luck”. Being dead is the only way they'll learn!

I am sometimes amazed at how furious and unpleasant people can be, particularly behind a pseudonym on an internet message board.

I have had a quick look at a couple of the BBC and other broadcasting forums over the last week. From the tone of some of the remarks, Chris Evans appears to have beaten the Queen Mother to death with a litter of particularly cute puppies.

“What has this got to do with sleeping patterns?” I hear you cry. Well, Chris will have to change his for his new show. My new hours mean I haven't had a chance to hear him yet. Under the old regime I would get back and at 7.30 flip the radio on for a few minutes of Terry and then off to sleep.

Now I am back and up the wooden hill to bedfordshire before Chris starts. Better check out the iPlayer.

The side effects of this are that instead of being up at about 10.30, I can be fully awake by about 9.00. The whole day stretches ahead which usually involves a trip to the office, in case you think that we only do three hours a day.

I have been trying to stay up to my normal bedtime of 7.30 or 8pm. However, sometimes I have had it by about 7.

This means my bedtime is 30 minutes earlier than it was in 1966!


A world of opportunity awaits in 2010. Will this mean more brisk walking? Back at the gym with a vengeance? Daytime improving lectures or maybe some classes. I could learn Mandarin or how to play the didgeridoo.

On the evidence of the first two weeks, I have spent the time idling and watching such improving television programmes as Megastructures and Campervan Crisis.

Next week, I shall start to have a look at what live music is going on. Need a gig fix. Need to take myself in hand.

I would shake myself by the scruff of the neck.

However, it is still slightly sore having been hanged for the heinous crime of accidentally dropping a ticket stub as I got off the 51E one night in 1977 coming back from Birmingham after a night out.